Then there are a couple almost as simple that just take a bit longer; twenty events in your candidate's homeland with the button up and fifteen rounds of Southsun Survival.
Ooh, that second one sounds scary! It does, doesn't it? Well it's not, because you don't need to win, or even try. Doesn't matter if you come dead last every time. You just have to be there at the end, fifteen times. Anyone can do that, even if they hate PvP.
Four down. Need two more. If you like Dungeons there's another gimme. Finish any one dungeon with the button on. If you like Fractals, same thing, except it has to be the Jade Maw. (Don't look at me, I never even heard of it).
I don't like dungeons or fractals. What does that leave? I need two more
Master Marksman for one. Shoot ten people in the head. That's another Southsun Survival one. Surprisingly easy so long as you don't mind PvP. I did that. Enjoyed it too. Shot a few more people than I probably needed to, as it happens. Don't judge me.
That's seven. Three left. The hard ones. There's one that's hard 'cos it takes ages and two that are hard 'cos they're hard. The slow one is getting two and a half thousand points at Southsun Survival. I could do that but I reckon it would take me about 70-75 rounds, which, even if no-one tries to win by hiding, is something like ten hours.
I got 530 points from fifteen goes. Best score was 60. Came second that time, using my secret strategy (that I adapted from Jeromai's. Alright, it's basically same as his only with more Karka). After the first couple of runs, when I was still trying to win and came last or thereabouts with two points if I was lucky, I changed to that tactic and from then on I averaged forty to sixty points a go. Still going to take way too long to get 2500, though, so forget that one.
Okay, so I ruled out dungeons, fractals and point accumulation and ruled in headshots. Got five. Need one more.
Not much choice. None, in fact. The last two are Direct Support and Advanced Support and you can't do Advanced until you've done Direct, so Direct Support it is. And what is it? It's stopping a lot of filthy pirates stealing Gnasher's hard
So we "upped it a notch" That what the woman called it. More like twenty notches. Tried it with a ranger. Died. Tried it with the other ranger, the one that uses traps. Lived, but lost. Snares, roots, knockbacks, spikes, no good. Same thing every time. Too many plunderers, too few of me. I need someone who can be in two places at once.
Only one class left on this account. Cometh the hour, cometh the necromancer. First run's close, but all the runs are close. Close does not get you the cigar. Or the Achievement. If this doesn't work it'll be time to drag Mrs Bhagpuss away from Tinkerfest. No, come on, you can do it.
All that for an Evon Gnashblade mini. It's the biggest mini I've ever seen, mind you. It's literally taller than she is. Still, I don't collect minis. I can't keep them in the bag five minutes before I've sent them back to the bank by mistake so what's the point? Why did I start this in the first place?
Syp's joined the doubters. He's not having fun. I am, though and that's the problem. I'm doing things I don't want to do for reasons I can't explain to get rewards I don't want to have and I'm enjoying it.
I think I need an Intervention.